Letters 46.1–49.1

Love has no measure, impatience knows no limit, and longing does not endure. So we too, forgetting our strength and thinking not of what we can do but only of what we wish, desire as pupils to teach our teacher, and, as the common proverb has it, the pig to teach the inventor of the arts. You, who first set the spark to our tinder, who urged us to this pursuit both by word and by example, and gathered us like a hen her chicks under her wings, do you now let us fly freely without our mother, and dread the hawk, and fear every shadow of passing birds? So, the only thing we can do while absent, we pour out plaintive prayers and bear witness to our longing not so much with tears as with wailing, that you may give our Marcella back to us, and not let her, so gentle, so sweet, sweeter than all honey and sweetness, be stern and wrinkle her brow with sadness toward those whom by her affability she has drawn to a similar way of life.

Certainly, if what we ask is better, the desire is not shameless. If all the words of Scripture agree with our view, we do not act boldly in calling you to those things to which you have very often urged us. God's first word to Abraham was: "Go out from your land and from your kindred, and go into the land that I will show you." The patriarch, to whom the promise of Christ was first made, is commanded to leave the Chaldeans; to leave the city of confusion and Rehoboth, that is, its broad places; to leave the plain of Shinar, where the tower of pride was raised to heaven; and, after the waves of this world, after the rivers by which the saints sat and wept when they remembered Zion, after the heavy flood of Chebar, from which Ezekiel, lifted by the hair of his head, is carried to Jerusalem, to dwell in the land of promise, which is not watered from below like Egypt but from above, and does not produce vegetables, the food of the sick, but awaits the early and the late rain from heaven. This land, mountainous and set on high, has greater spiritual delights the more it is free of worldly ones. Finally Mary too, the mother of the Lord, after the angel's promise was made to her and she understood that her womb was the house of the Son of God, left the plains and went into the hill country. From this city, once the foreign enemy had been overcome and struck on his devilish, bold forehead, and after he fell on his face, a crowd of rejoicing souls came out, and a choir sang together of the ten thousands of our David and proclaimed his victory. In it the angel holding a sword and laying waste the whole ungodly world marked out the temple of the Lord on the threshing floor of Ornan, king of the Jebusites, signifying even then that the church of Christ would arise not in Israel but among the Gentiles. Go back to Genesis and you will find Melchizedek, king of Salem, prince of this city, who even then, as a type of Christ, offered bread and wine and dedicated the Christian mystery in the Savior's body and blood.

Perhaps you silently criticize us for not following the order of the Scriptures but touching here and there on whatever comes our way in confused speech. We testified at the beginning that love has no order and impatience knows no measure (hence in the Song of Songs it is commanded, as something difficult, "Set love in order in me"), and now we say the same: we slip not from ignorance but from affection. So, to bring out something even more disorderly, older things must be recalled. In this city, or rather in this very place, Adam is said to have lived and died. Hence the place where our Lord was crucified is called Calvary, because the skull of the ancient man was buried there, so that the second Adam, and the blood of Christ dripping from the cross, might wash away the sins of the first Adam, lying there, the father of the race; and then that saying of the apostle would be fulfilled: "Awake, you who sleep, and arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light." It would take long to list how many prophets, how many holy men this city has sent forth. Our whole mystery is native to this province and city. In three names it shows the faith of the Trinity: it is called Jebus, Salem, and Jerusalem. The first name means "trodden down", the second "peace", the third "vision of peace". For little by little we come to the end, and after being trodden down we are raised to the vision of peace. From this peace Solomon, that is, the peaceable, was born in it, and his place was made in peace; and, as a figure of Christ, from the meaning of the city's name he received the name of Lord of lords and King of kings. Why should we speak of David and all his offspring who reigned in this city? As much as Judea is higher than the other provinces, so much is this city higher than all Judea. And, to put it more briefly, the glory of the whole province is claimed for the metropolis, and whatever praise belongs to the members is all referred to the body.

For a while now the very strokes of our letters have felt that you are eager to burst into words, and the page understands the objection coming against it. For you will answer and say that these things were so formerly, when "the Lord loved the gates of Zion above all the tents of Jacob," and "its foundations were on the holy mountains" (although these things can also be interpreted in a higher sense); but that after the voice of the Lord rising up thundered, "See, your house will be left to you desolate," and he tearfully prophesied its ruin, saying, "Jerusalem, Jerusalem, who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I wanted to gather your children as a hen her chicks under her wings, and you would not! See, your house will be left to you desolate"; and after the veil of the temple was torn and Jerusalem was surrounded by an army and defiled by the Lord's blood, then the protection of the angels and the grace of Christ departed from it. Moreover, you will say, Josephus, the native writer of the Jews, asserts that at the time the Lord was crucified, from the inner shrine of the temple a voice of heavenly powers broke out, saying, "Let us depart from these seats"; from which and from other things it appears that where grace abounded, sin abounded even more; and that after the apostles heard, "Go, therefore, teach all nations," and the apostles themselves said, "It was necessary to speak the word to you first; but since you would not, see, we turn to the Gentiles," then the whole mystery of Judea and God's ancient familiarity with it were transferred through the apostles to the nations.

It is indeed a strong question, one that could shake even those who have touched the Scriptures a little; but it is very easily solved. The Lord would never have wept over its fall unless he loved it; he wept for Lazarus too, because he loved him. And yet know this at first glance: the sin was not of the place but of the people; but because the slaughter of the people is the captivity of the city, the city was destroyed so that the people might be punished, and the temple overthrown so that the typical sacrifices might be taken away. As for the place itself, with the progress of time it is now much more august than it was before. The Jews once venerated the Holy of Holies, because there were the cherubim, the mercy seat, the ark of the covenant, the manna, Aaron's rod, and the golden altar: does not the Lord's tomb seem to you more venerable? As often as we enter it, we see the Savior lying in the linen cloth, and, lingering there a little, we see again the angel sitting at his feet and the napkin rolled up at his head. We know that the glory of this tomb was prophesied long before it was hewn out by Joseph, in the prophecy of Isaiah, who says, "And his rest shall be glory," meaning that the place of the Lord's burial would be honored by all.

But you say: "How is it that we read in the Apocalypse of John: 'And the beast that comes up from the abyss will kill them' (no doubt the prophets), 'and their bodies will lie in the streets of the great city, which is spiritually called Sodom and Egypt, where also their Lord was crucified'? If," you say, "the great city in which the Lord was crucified is spiritually called Sodom and Egypt, then Jerusalem, in which the Lord was crucified, is Sodom and Egypt." First, we want you to know that all of holy Scripture cannot contradict itself, and above all one book does not disagree with itself, and, to add more, the same passage of the same book. For in the Apocalypse, from which you have now brought testimony, about ten verses before it is written: "Rise and measure the temple of God and the altar and those who worship in it; but the court outside the temple cast out and do not measure it, because it has been given to the Gentiles, and they will trample the holy city for forty-two months." If the Apocalypse was written by John long after the Lord's Passion, and in it Jerusalem is called the holy city, how is it again spiritually called Sodom and Egypt? Nor can you say at once that the heavenly Jerusalem which is to come is called holy, and the one that fell is called Egypt and Sodom; because it is said of the future that the beast that is to come up from the abyss will make war against the two prophets and conquer and kill them, and their bodies will lie in the streets of the great city. Of this city it is also written at the end of the same book: "And the city lies foursquare, and its length and breadth are as great as its height. And he measured the city with the reed, twelve thousand stadia; its length, breadth, and height are equal. And he measured its walls, a hundred and forty-four cubits, by the measure of a man, which is an angel's. And the construction of its wall was of jasper stone, and the city itself of pure gold," and so on. Where there is a square, neither length nor breadth can be spoken of. And what measure is this, that its length and breadth are as great as its height, and walls of jasper, and the whole city of pure gold, and its foundations and streets of precious stones, and twelve gates shining with pearls?

Since, then, these things cannot be taken literally (for it is absurd to proclaim a city's length and breadth to be twelve thousand stadia and its height as great), each must be understood spiritually. And the great city, which Cain first built and named after his son, is to be taken as this world, which the devil, the accuser of his brothers and a fratricide doomed to perish, built with vices, founded on crimes, and filled with iniquity; and it is spiritually called Sodom and Egypt. Of this Sodom it is written, "Sodom will be restored to its former state," that is, the world will be restored to what it was before. For we cannot believe that Sodom will be rebuilt, and the others, Gomorrah, Admah, and Zeboiim, left in perpetual ashes. And we never read Egypt for Jerusalem, but always for this world. And since it would take long to gather countless examples from the Scriptures, let us bring one testimony where this world is most plainly called Egypt. In the catholic letter the apostle Jude, the brother of James, writes: "I wish to remind you, though you once knew all things, that Jesus, having saved the people from the land of Egypt, afterwards destroyed those who did not believe." And lest you think this said of Jesus son of Nun, it follows at once: "And the angels who did not keep their own dominion but left their proper dwelling he has kept in eternal chains under darkness for the judgment of the great day." And so that you may believe that wherever Egypt, Sodom, and Gomorrah are named together, not places but this world is meant, he at once adds the example: "As Sodom and Gomorrah and the neighboring cities, which in like manner committed fornication and went after other flesh, have been made an example, suffering the punishment of eternal fire." And what need is there to seek more, when after the Lord's Passion and resurrection the evangelist Matthew records: "And the rocks were split and the tombs opened, and many bodies of the saints who had fallen asleep arose; and coming out of the tombs after his resurrection they entered the holy city and appeared to many"? Nor is the heavenly Jerusalem to be understood in this place, as many absurdly think, since there could have been no sign among men of the Lord's rising if the bodies of the saints were seen in the heavenly Jerusalem. Since, then, both the evangelists and all Scripture name Jerusalem the holy city, and the psalmist commands, "Let us worship in the place where his feet stood," do not allow yourself to hear it called Sodom and Egypt, the city by which the Lord forbids us to swear, because it is the city of the great King.

They call the land accursed because it drank the Lord's blood; and how do they think those places blessed in which Peter and Paul, the leaders of the Christian army, shed their blood for Christ? If the confession of servants and men is glorious, why should the confession of the Lord and God not be glorious? Everywhere we venerate the tombs of the martyrs, and, putting the holy ashes to our eyes, we even touch them with our lips if we may; and do some think the tomb in which the Lord was laid should be neglected? If we do not believe ourselves, let us at least believe the devil and his angels, who, whenever they are expelled from possessed bodies before it, tremble as if standing before the tribunal of Christ, roar, and grieve too late that they crucified one whom they fear. If after the Lord's Passion this place is detestable, as a wicked voice cries, what did Paul mean by hurrying to Jerusalem to keep Pentecost there? To those who tried to hold him back he said: "What are you doing, weeping and troubling my heart? For I am ready not only to be bound but also to die in Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus." What of the other saints and illustrious men, whose vows and offerings, after the preaching of Christ, were carried to the brothers who were at Jerusalem?

It would take long now to run through each age from the Lord's ascension to the present day, and tell which bishops, which martyrs, which men eloquent in church teaching have come to Jerusalem, thinking that they had less religion, less knowledge, and had not received the finishing touch, as they say, of virtue unless they had worshiped Christ in the places where the gospel first shone out from the cross. Certainly, if even the famous orator thinks someone blameworthy because he learned Greek letters not at Athens but at Lilybaeum, and Latin not at Rome but in Sicily (since, that is, each province has something of its own that another cannot equally have), why should we think anyone has reached the height of study without our Athens?

Nor do we say this to deny that the kingdom of God is within us and that there are holy men in other regions too, but to assert this above all: that those who are first in the whole world gather here together. We have come to these places not as the first but as the last, to see in them the first of all nations. Certainly the choir of monks and virgins is a kind of flower and most precious stone among the ornaments of the church. Whoever has been first in Gaul hurries here. The Briton, divided from our world, if he has made progress in religion, leaves the setting sun behind and seeks a place known to him only by fame and by the account of the Scriptures. Why mention the Armenians, the Persians, the peoples of India and Ethiopia, and Egypt next to them, fertile in monks, Pontus and Cappadocia, Coele-Syria and Mesopotamia, and all the swarms of the East? According to the Savior's word, "Wherever the body is, there the eagles will gather," they hasten to these places and show us examples of various virtues. Their voices differ, but their religion is one. There are almost as many choirs of psalm singers as there are different nations; and among them, what is perhaps the first virtue among Christians, there is nothing arrogant, no haughtiness about continence: there is a contest of humility among all. Whoever is last is thought first here. In dress there is no distinction, no admiration. However one likes to walk, it brings neither blame nor praise. Fasting exalts no one; neither is deference paid to going without food nor is moderate fullness condemned. Each stands or falls to his own master. No one judges another, lest he be judged by the Lord. And what is common in most provinces, that people tear one another with the back tooth, is not found here at all. Far away is self-indulgence, far away is pleasure.

There are so many places of prayer in the city itself that a day is not enough to go round them; but, to come to the little country house of Christ and the inn of Mary (for each praises more what he possesses), with what speech, with what voice can we set out for you the Savior's cave? And that manger in which he wailed as a little child is to be honored by silence rather than by feeble speech. Where are the broad colonnades? Where the gilded ceilings? Where the houses clothed by the sufferings of the poor and the labor of the condemned? Where the basilicas built like palaces with private wealth, so that the worthless little body of a man may walk about in greater luxury, and, as though anything could be more ornate than the world, may prefer to look at its own roof rather than at the sky? See, in this small hole in the earth the Creator of the heavens was born. Here he was wrapped in swaddling clothes, here seen by the shepherds, here pointed out by the star, here adored by the magi. And, I think, this place is holier than the Tarpeian rock, which, often struck by lightning from heaven, showed what displeased the Lord.

Read the Apocalypse of John and see what is sung of the woman clothed in purple with blasphemy written on her forehead, of the seven hills, the many waters, and the fall of Babylon. "Come out of her, my people," says the Lord, "and do not share in her sins and receive of her plagues." Going back to Jeremiah, notice what is likewise written: "Flee from the midst of Babylon, and let each save his soul. For Babylon the great has fallen, has fallen, and has become a dwelling of demons and a hold of every unclean spirit." There is indeed a holy church there; there are the trophies of the apostles and martyrs; there is the true confession of Christ and the faith preached by the apostles, and the Christian name, having trampled paganism underfoot, lifts itself higher every day; but the very ambition, power, and greatness of the city, being seen and seeing, being greeted and greeting, praising and disparaging, hearing or speaking, and having to endure, even unwillingly, such crowds of people, are foreign to the purpose and quiet of monks. For either we see those who come to us and lose our silence, or we do not see them and are accused of pride. And sometimes, to return visits, we go to proud doors and pass through gilded doorposts amid the tongues of backbiting servants. But in Christ's little country house, as we said above, all is rustic, and outside the psalms there is silence. Wherever you turn, the plowman holding the plow-handle sings alleluia, the sweating reaper diverts himself with psalms, and the vinedresser, pruning the vine with his curved knife, sings something of David. These are the songs of this province, these, as people say, its love songs; this is the shepherds' whistling; these are the tools of cultivation.

But what are we doing, thinking only of what we desire and not of what is fitting? O when will that time come when a breathless traveler brings the news that our Marcella has landed on the shore of Palestine, and the whole choirs of monks and all the ranks of virgins will resound? We already long to run to meet you and, without waiting for a carriage, to carry ourselves swiftly on foot. We shall hold your hands, see your face, and scarcely be torn from the longed-for embrace. Will that day come, then, when we may enter the Savior's cave, weep at the Lord's tomb with a sister, weep with a mother; then kiss the wood of the cross, and on the Mount of Olives be lifted up in prayer and spirit with the ascending Lord; see Lazarus come out bound in grave-clothes, and the waters of the Jordan made purer by the Lord's washing; then go to the shepherds' folds, pray at the tomb of David, see the prophet Amos even now sounding his shepherd's horn on his rock; hurry to the tents or the memorials of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and of the three illustrious women; see the spring in which the eunuch was baptized by Philip; go to Samaria and venerate together the ashes of John the Baptist, Elisha, and Obadiah; enter the caves in which companies of prophets were fed in the time of persecution and famine? We shall go to Nazareth and, according to the meaning of its name, see the flower of Galilee. Not far from there Cana will be seen, where the water was turned into wine. We shall go to Tabor and to the Savior's tents, and see him not, as Peter once wished, with Moses and Elijah, but with the Father and the Holy Spirit. From there we shall come to the sea of Gennesaret and see where five and four thousand men were fed in the desert from five and seven loaves. The town of Nain will appear, at whose gates the widow's son was raised. Hermon will be seen, and the torrent of Endor, where Sisera was overcome. Capernaum too, familiar with the Lord's signs, and all Galilee together will be seen. Then, with Christ as our companion, when we have returned through Shiloh and Bethel and the other places where churches have been raised like banners of the Lord's victories, to our own cave, we shall sing continually, weep often, pray without ceasing, and, wounded with the Savior's dart, say together: "I have found him whom my soul sought; I will hold him and not let him go."

Having read the letter your graciousness bestowed on me when I did not expect it, I was glad indeed of the testimony of an honorable and most eloquent man; but, coming back to myself, I grieved a good deal that, unworthy of such great praise and commendation, I am weighed down rather than lifted up. For you know that our teaching holds up the banner of humility, and that by walking through the lowest places we climb to the heights. Who and what am I, then, that I should deserve the testimony of a learned voice, that the palm of eloquence should be offered me by one who, by writing so eloquently, has deterred me from writing? Yet I must dare, and let love, which seeks not its own but its neighbor's good, return the courtesy of a greeting, since it cannot fill the place of a teacher.

I congratulate you and your holy and venerable sister Serenilla, who, true to her name, has trodden down the waves of the world and reached the calm of Christ; although this omen of a name is foreordained in you too. For we read that holy Daniel also was called a man of desires and a friend of God, because he desired to know his mysteries. So, what the venerable Paula has asked me to do, I do of my own accord: I urge and beg you, by the love of the Lord, to grant us the sight of you and, taking occasion of the holy places, to enrich us with so great a gift. Certainly, even if our company should displease you, to have worshiped where the Lord's feet stood is part of faith, and to have seen, as it were, the fresh traces of his nativity, cross, and Passion.

Of my little works I have sent nothing, since very many have flown from their nest and been spread abroad with the rash honor of publication, lest I should perhaps send what you already have. But if you wish to borrow copies, you can get them either from holy Marcella, who lives on the Aventine, or from Domnio, the Lot of our time, a most holy man. As for me, awaiting your presence, I will either give you everything when you come, or, if any difficulties prevent this, I will gladly send whatever you ask. I have written a book On Illustrious Men, from the apostles to our own age, imitating Tranquillus and the Greek Apollonius; and after a catalogue of very many I placed myself at the end of the volume, as one untimely born and the least of all Christians; there I had to note briefly what I had written up to the fourteenth year of the emperor Theodosius. When you have obtained this book from the persons mentioned above, whatever you lack of the list I will have copied for you little by little, if you wish.

Christian modesty sometimes requires silence even toward friends, and consoling one's humility by silence rather than incurring the charge of ambition by reviving old friendships. As long as you were silent, I was silent, and never wished to complain about it, lest I seem not to seek a friend but to court a more powerful man. But now, called forth by the courtesy of your letter, I shall try always to take the first part, and not so much to reply as to write, so that it may be known that I was modestly silent until now and have begun, more modestly still, to speak.

I know very well that you acted both wisely and lovingly in withdrawing copies of my little works against Jovinian. But this care was of no use, since several people coming from the city read me the same passages, which they said they had taken down at Rome. In this province too the books had already been published, and, as you yourself have read, "a word once sent out cannot return." I am not so fortunate as many writers of this time, that I can correct my trifles when I please. As soon as I have written anything, either my friends or my enemies, with different aims but equal zeal, spread it among the public; and in praise or in blame they go to excess, following not the merit of the style but their own temper. So I have done the only thing I could: I have dedicated to you an apology for that work; when you have read it, you will either satisfy the others on my behalf, or, if you too turn up your nose, you will be compelled to explain differently that passage of the apostle in which he discusses virginity and marriage.

I do not say this to provoke you to write, though I profess your zeal for the sacred writings to be greater than mine, but so that you may compel others who tear me to pieces to do so. They know letters and think themselves learned: they can not only criticize me but teach me. If they write something, my interpretation will be neglected all the more by comparison with their works. Read, I beg you, and consider carefully the words of the apostle, and then you will see that, to avoid misrepresentation, I was much more lenient toward the married than he wished. Origen, Dionysius, Pierius, Eusebius of Caesarea, Didymus, and Apollinaris have interpreted this letter at great length; of these Pierius, when he was examining and discussing the apostle's meaning and had set out to explain the words, "I wish that all were as I myself," added: "In saying this Paul openly preaches celibacy." What is my sin here, what my harshness? Everything I have written is very mild compared with this statement. Go through the commentaries of all those I have named, and make use of the libraries of the churches, and you will come more quickly to what you desire and have begun.

I hear that the enthusiasm of the whole city has been stirred in your favor; I hear that the will of the bishop and the people agree. It is less to hold the priesthood than to deserve it. If you read the books of the sixteen prophets which I have translated from the Hebrew language into Latin, and I learn that you are pleased with this work, you will provoke me not to keep the rest shut up in the cupboard. I have lately translated Job into our language; you can borrow a copy from holy Marcella, your cousin. Read the same book in Greek and Latin, and compare the old edition with our translation, and you will clearly see how far apart truth and falsehood are. I had sent some commentaries on the twelve prophets to holy father Domnio, and also Samuel and Malachim, that is, the four books of Kingdoms. If you wish to read them, you will prove how difficult it is to understand divine Scripture, and especially the prophets, and how, through the fault of the translators, what flows among the Hebrews in the purest course of speech swarms with faults among us. Moreover, do not look in little men for the eloquence that you despise in Cicero for Christ's sake. A church translation, even if it has charm of style, ought to hide and avoid it, so as to speak not to the idle schools of the philosophers and a few disciples, but to the whole human race.

The reason I have not written to you until now was your silence. I was afraid that, if I wrote to you while you kept silent, you would think me more tiresome than dutiful. But now, challenged by your most delightful letter, and by a letter of the kind that calls me to the philosophy of our teaching, I receive my one-time fellow student, comrade, and friend with open arms, as the saying goes, and I am preparing a defender for my little works; on this condition, however, that I first have you as a judge won over, or rather, that I first brief my advocate on everything with which I am charged. For both your Tully and, before him, Antonius, in his short and single volume, write that the first step to victory is to learn thoroughly the case one is going to plead.